don't be mewled by warlocks on my yacht

May 7^th, 2006: In Cincinnati I'm running my first marathon. I couldn't be more nervous about it. I think I'm really underprepared. I made running schedules that now seem optimistically naive. Things like severe rain, homework, sickness, and unforseen circumstances slipped in as usual. In my head, I always had lots of time left to make up my missed days -- but now it's about three weeks away and there's no time left to be come overprepared like I'd wanted to be.

Nearly everything I've read in the past year while considering running a marathon has suggested that I not set any time goal for this first race. I'm human though (LandonBot3000 is not yet fully operational) so I made this internal goal for myself that I will now reveal to the world: beat Oprah. Yes, that's right. My dreams will be realized if I can best 4:29:20 and thus do one thing better than Oprah.

John Vanderslice
04/17 Mon, Columbus OH
High Five w/ Wooden Wand, Eric Metronome | Early show! Doors at 6pm